Gibbous Thoughts From a Lunatic Moon

Your planet looks so calm from up here. So blue dotted with clumps of land that look like they used to fit together. Of all the gin joints in the galaxy the creatures that roam your orb must be celebrating day and night....but I hear otherwise.

And here I am in this cratered hunk of celestial debris. I don’t mean to complain particularly with all the green cheese I could ever ask for. Then we have that cow jumping over nightly while we dance by the light of. Thanks for that Hey diddle, diddle moment.

Consigned as we are out here to mere satellite status we laugh at earthlings for all those songs written about us. Frankly we’re tired of it all. Can we help it for being over-rhymed with June, spoon, swoon and lagoon? I’ll see your Looney Tunes and raise you a dearth, worth, girth, birth and Colin Firth.

You’ve had your fun with us. Don’t think we are ungrateful being a sonata or serenade. But we are not a paper moon and we have no moon river.

We moon dwellers use to resent being associated with lunacy however after observing your earthly shenanigans we think you are the ones ready for the loony-bin.

We are modest folk out here but assert our pull and pleased to set your calendar. We have a Man in the Moon, happily married. Together they see to it that your ocean tides are raised on schedule even if we go into near-vanishing mode in daylight.

Mostly we are nocturnal prowlers patrolling the night sky occasionally answering the howl of a wolf. Why we appear full to you in spooky movies is your problem. If I had my way we’d be a crescent reclining all the time. Though we possess little it is also my favorite apostrophe.

My advice is for you folks to visit more often. We enjoyed your small step for man. You are long overdue for that giant step for mankind. Stop abusing yourself like a wrecking ball. Get a grip. Or a gossamer thread to steady yourself. It seems from here that your dish ran away with your spoon. I fear if you go we go with you.

We’ve given you a blue moon, a harvest moon and our moon over Miami. Now it’s payback time. All we ask is you behave yourself.