Conundrum of Pronouns

There’s so damn many of them. Almost as many Democratic candidates as there are pronouns. I count six Senators, five from the House of Representatives, two governors, a mayor, a former Cabinet member and assorted other wannabes.  

It’s not a matter of Us vs Them; it is Us against Us. The last thing we need is a discord of trumpets.

She’s good and Her also and for Him I still feel the Bern. I want to vote for Her or Her or Him but not sure They, in the heartland, will cast their lot for either of Them. It won’t surprise me if the primaries go to Him, that guy who doesn’t get it, the Delaware apologist for banks who can’t bring himself to apologize for his touchy-feely ways and whom I can’t forgive what He did to Her back then and now we’re stuck with that other Him on the high court.

If the white-haired He gets the nod over all of Them will Those with skin of darker shade even turn out and why should they unless the overwhelming issue is to get rid of the venal disgrace in the oval whose conscience must have been removed along with his tonsils? So tell me please, I beg you, there are plenty of undecided Us.

Can it be that the S word, once poison, is finally an electable tag? It would be a crowning valedictory moment as I ride off into the sunset. Not that long ago We had to whisper, Socialism, even though Socialite was an elitist word, Sociology an acceptable major in college and Social Tea Biscuits have endured…or have they? And there is Social Security and all those other government welfare programs for the defense contractors, agribusiness and football teams. 

In any case Bernie has ushered Socialism onto the American tongue as long as it is preceded by the word, Democratic. I expect Trump may be salivating over the prospect of defamatory epithets. He doesn’t bother with pronouns; He goes right to the noun of it.

Maybe Kamala Harris or Elizabeth Warren, She or She, can ride in through the back door given old man Biden’s age, actuarially speaking. Either one of Them. Undifferentiated pronouns. Republican defectors might go for Klobuchar or Gillibrand or Uncle Joe but not for the aforementioned. Do we vote our convictions or settle for the more likely winner, anyone of the Somebodies? The evil of two lessors is a familiar dilemma. 

These are no ordinary times. In any other election year I might regard our eighteen candidates as an embarrassment of riches. However at this point, with the most toxic administration in American history in the balance, my inclination is take the safer bet. Anyone will do who can deliver Donald to a rubber room observed through one-way glass by a man with monocle.