Saturday, March 2, 2013

English Is a Second Language Way Down In the Hole

Doris overhears Morris saying something to Horace about Delores. But she gets the meaning wrong when she tells Cloris who then conveys it to Boris. And now we have the makings of another B movie which is what happened to me this past week.

The doctor ordered two prescriptions, drugs A and B, which were Faxed to our AARP mail order service. An interim three-week supply was also called into our local pharmacy. The mail order alerted me that the price of drug A is $240 and drug B $900 for a 90 day supply. I told them to hold the order and do not proceed.

I then found I could get medication A for $12 at the pharmacy I once owned and discovered that drug B was available from Canada for $95.

Bear with me.

I then asked the doctor’s nurse to Fax the order to the Canadian pharmacy. She did but also Faxed it (again) to AARP which promptly filled and sent it off to us. By so doing we would fall into the dreaded donut hole. This is devoutly to be avoided because all other medications become charged at 80% of list price rather than the usual co-pay.

Are you still there?

There’s no stopping the AARP mail order but I’m told to send it back by overnight mail to a San Diego address when it arrives. I do but they refuse to open it because it isn’t in their special Return-Drug Kit envelop. The robots in North Carolina will not call the robots in San Diego.

Now we are running out of the interim supply obtained locally at our corner drugstore. We need a refill to hold us until the Canadian order arrives. The local pharmacy gets a waiver to fill a ten-day supply but the charge is $275 because of the damnable donut hole.

My vital signs have gone awry. My hair is falling out. I’m trying to reason with sub-humans over the phone. Trina will not speak to Tina about Lena.

If this weren’t so boring and void of interest to anyone except me it would make a great movie. Maybe it could be a sci-fi flick about life in a donut hole which must be what Dante had in mind writing about the circles of the Inferno.


1 comment: